Relief

It's early so forgive me if my thoughts are not super cohesive. :/

Well he did it. God humbled me. Again.

But I guess this one was different because for once it wasn't painful, and instead I was filled with relief and was THANKING God for humbling me.

While I was dating Sam, I used to think that I was SO ready to get married... Why? I don't know. I guess I just really enjoyed her companionship and was ready to skip these single years of my life for her friendship for the rest of my life. I wanted marriage so badly that I was blinded to what that actually entailed. I still don't know what all it involves, but thankfully God revealed to me that I am nowhere NEAR being ready. He left me asking myself, "What in the WORLD possessed me to think that I was ready to be the leader in a relationship?" I specifically remember thinking 6 months ago that If I could have married her then I would have. Now I thank God that he didn't let me. I wasn't ready. She wasn't ready. And the worst part is NEITHER of us could admit it. Totally ignoring what God would have wanted for our lives, we were pursuing something we wanted and THOUGHT we could handle. No. Way.

So instead of mourning the seemingly broken relationship with my best friend of two years, I can praise God and rejoice because I somehow found the courage to turn away from something I wanted SO badly to obey God. It was not easy; probably the hardest thing that I have ever done by far. I was only able to do it because of the courage that came from HIM.

Only God knows what things he has in store for you. It may be hard sometimes but you can follow his plan... or you can continue with what you think is best for you. But all you have to do is listen for His voice and respond. It may be hard, but God says "'For I know the plans I have for you!' Declares the Lord, 'Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future" - Jeremiah 29:11

His plan will prosper us. Not in the worldly sense, but in his eternal sense. If we listen to his voice, our relationship with HIM will prosper. Our joy in HIM will prosper. Our love for everyone will prosper. Our love for Christ, will prosper.