Take last week. I was so confident that Christ was guiding me in the direction that he wanted. Every time I thought about my past and worried about the direction of my life it was so easy to lay it down and give it to Christ. So easy! I just felt like God was using a magnet walking along beside me holding it above me pulling up every doubt and every fear that entered my mind! And I felt His presence with me feeding me confidence that can ONLY come from him!
Well...
Why does that kind of confidence seem to waver so easily?
It's almost felt like I have had to force it away from me. Almost like these thoughts would pop into my heart/mind and when I give it to God these thought are like gripping my heart and I am dragging them ever so slowly out of my heart to give them to God. I have to FORCE them. It is not a fun process. Kind of painful and VERY annoying.
The thing is... I know God is good. I know that He is going to continue teaching me. I know (regardless of how I may be feeling at the moment) that God is always with me. So why does it feel so difficult sometimes? My only explanation is this - Because I am human. And as a human we need to be reminded that we need God not only in the big decisions of our life, but every day. Every minute. But the cool thing is no matter how we are feeling or whether we think He is close or not, He is always with us ready to guide us in life. All we have to do is listen.
And the best part is, God reveals His glory out of the ashes in our life! That is what we are here for anyways! His Glory. And THAT is why we can praise Him in all things. Because God reveals Himself when we trust him in the darkest times of our life.
So praise be to God!
"Praise the Lord, my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
Praise the Lord, my soul, and forget not all his benefits-
Who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases,
who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion
who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.
The Lord works righteousness and justice for all the oppressed
he made known his ways to Moses his deeds to the people of Isreal:
The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love.
He will not always accuse nor will he harbor his anger forever;
He does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities.
For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him"
Psalm 103: 1-11
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